What do girls really want? What turns them on, what makes them attracted to a man, and what are they really looking for?
8 Dark Truths that Girls Want
- Girls Want Masculine men
- Girls Don’t Want Nice Guys
- Girls Want Challenge
- Girls Want Mystery
- Girls Want Love
- Girls Want to Tame the Bad Boy
- Girls Want to Chase Men
- Girls Want High Value Men
Women seem so mysterious. Their emotions make them unpredictable. They are, in so many ways, like cats: uncontrollable. They choose who they like and it seems that you (the man) have no choice in the matter.
So what do girls want? This article explores this question in depth. It pulls back the curtain to reveal the cold, hard truth about women and their desires.
This article is not for the faint of heart. It is not politically correct. But it is the truth. And if you embrace the truth, it will set you free and set you on the path to getting what you want: more love, affection, and intimacy.
1. Girls Want Masculine Men
Men are masculine and women are feminine. It doesn’t matter what society or culture says, women respond to their biology. A girl wants what her biology wants: masculine man, not feminine men.
So, what is a masculine man?
A masculine man exhibits masculine energy. Masculine energy is all about freedom, independence, building things, creating things, and focusing on your mission and your purpose.
Feminine energy, on the other hand, is focused on relationships, nurturing, and family maintenance.
Despite modern society telling us that men should be more feminine and relationship focused; and women should be more career focused–a woman’s biology does not respond to this dynamic.
Feminine energy is attracted to masculine energy. If, at any time, you cross over into feminine energy and become too relationship focused and nurturing, you will turn women off. This leads us onto our second point…
2. Girls Don’t Want Nice Guys
Nice guys are full of feminine energy. This is part of the reason why women don’t want nice guys.
Nice guys try to please women, and win a girl over with their kindness. Generally, nice guys also live in a state of anxiety.
They worry about pleasing girls; they worry about upsetting girls; they worry if they’re good enough for a girl; and they have the mistaken belief that girls want nice guys.
Nice guys, in general, are mostly inauthentic. They are only pretending to be nice to get what they want.
A nice guy will pretend to be romantic and caring because he thinks it will get him what he wants: more love and intimacy.
Women instinctively know this, and they see right through nice guy behavior.
This isn’t to say that women want to be with bad guys, but they do want to be with men who are authentic—men who aren’t afraid to go after that what they want and express their desires along the way, even if this means (momentarily) upsetting a girl.
In the world of attraction, bold men eat while nice guys starve.
3. Girls Want Challenge
Girls want to feel challenged. They want to win a man over. They don’t want a man who makes things too easy for them. This is another reason why nice guys are unsuccessful with women.
In most cases, 95% of men try to rush seduction. If the guy really likes a girl, they make themselves available all the time.
Again, science has shown that responsive men are less attractive to women. Girls want to work for your attention.
If you’re too responsive (meaning you are always available, you respond to messages too quickly, you’re always reaching out to her), you will turn a girl off.
The same applies if you give your love away too easily, a woman will not respect you, and she will not respect your love. There is truth to the saying: fast love is cheap love.
If you aren’t a challenge, and a woman finds it too easy to win you over, she will quickly lose interest in you.
Girls want a challenge; in fact, they need a challenge to feel excited about you and deem you worthy of relationship investment.
4. Girls Want Mystery
Girls love mystery. They love to think about a man and wonder what he is doing. Men who are mysterious and more attractive to women.
So, how do you become mysterious? It’s simple: you make yourself less available, you hold back, and you stop talking about your feelings.
It is much better to talk about your feelings with your male friends or your family, than to talk about your feelings with a girl you are dating.
This might sound harsh and counterintuitive, but men often reveal their emotions and feelings and wear their heart on their sleeve, only to find that girls lose interest in them.
Girls want to wonder what you’re thinking. They want to wonder whether or not you like them.
If a girl knows what you’re thinking all the time, she will quickly lose interest in you.
If you’re constantly telling a girl how much you miss her and love her, she doesn’t have to wonder how you feel about her-—she already knows the answer.
Give a girl mystery and you give her excitement, suspense, and the type of romance she desires.
5. Girls Want Love
Everyone wants love, especially women. But you have to give a woman love the right way. If you give your love away too easily, a woman won’t value it.
Instead, she will take your love for granted. You must get a woman to feel something for you first before she can fall in love with you.
In real life, attraction comes first followed by love. Attraction and love are two very separate feelings.
As I mention in my book, Atomic Attraction, attraction grows in anxiety, uncertainty, space, and tension. All the uncomfortable feelings that we don’t like to deal with, but are necessary to build attraction.
Love, on the other hand, is a warm, safe feeling where you trust someone and feel comfortable with them.
A good analogy would be to describe attraction as a pickup truck and love as a trailer. Attraction pulls love into the relationship, and it also has the ability to pull love out of a relationship too.
If you, as the man, take care of attraction, the woman will take care of the love and nurture the relationship.
If you act in a masculine, non-needy, non-relationship focused way, you give a woman space and allow her room to nurture the relationship and move it forward.
Yes, women want love but they want it done the right way with the right person.
6. Girls Want to Tame the Bad Boy
Girls want confident men and all that this encapsulates. Confidence is strength. It’s having the ability to go after what you want in life without fear and timidity.
Part of the reason why so-called “bad guys”are attractive is because they go after what they want without caring what other people think.
If you take the time to browse the woman’s romance section in a bookstore, the heroes of the book are not timid, weak, feminine men.
Girls want to read about confident, masculine men who are a little bit dangerous and edgy.
This ties into their desire to tame the bad boy. Now, girls don’t want to be around mean guys or assholes, who does? That’s no fun.
But they do want their men to have an edge, a little bit of unpredictability (with a wild streak too).
It’s easy to bring an edge into your character as a man. You simply make your focus freedom instead of relationships, as it should be.
Men should be focused on freedom and independence. This includes personal and financial freedom.
If you make this your number one priority, a woman will try to win you over by seeking commitment from you.
You’re a challenge, you’re mystery, and you’re just enough of a bad boy to make her go crazy for you.
7. Girls Want to Chase Men
This is a controversial subject. Tell any woman that women should chase men, and they will disagree with you. It’s not the way things are supposed to work.
The Disney prince is supposed to chase the princess and win her over. Real life, of course, is not a Disney movie. And science has even found that in 90% of cases it is the woman who initiates the seduction, not the man.
Women, however, do this in such a subtle way that most men don’t even realize they are being pursued.
If you’re a man with even just a modicum of experience, you will know this statement to be true. If a woman likes you and is attracted to you, she will chase you.
She will put herself on your radar. She will make herself available to you. She will seek you out and put herself into close proximity with you. And sometimes, she will directly start a conversation with you.
Women don’t chase men they aren’t attracted to, they only chase men they are attracted to. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t make the first move with a woman.
Even if a woman likes you, she will rarely make the first move. It is your job as a man to make the first move with a woman.
You must break the ice. You must push for intimacy and keep the relationship light and fun.
Then, once you have become intimate with a woman, you must back off. If you continue to chase a woman after intimacy, you will turn her off.
It is now, at this point, that the woman must begin to chase you with more frequency, as she pushes for more commitment from you.
8. Girls Want High Value Men
This goes without saying, girls want high value men. They don’t want low value men.
A low value man is weak, timid, feminine, responsive, relationship focused, needy, and unambitious.
High value men, on the other hand, are confident, strong, masculine, mysterious, challenging, edgy, independent, and highly ambitious.
It is interesting to note that women aren’t just attracted to successful men, they are just as attracted to men who are ambitious because these men have all the traits that are required to be successful in the future.
In other words, realized ambition is just as attractive as unrealized ambition, but you must be ambitious nonetheless.
Why are women so attracted to men with money? It is not the money that is attractive, it is the ability to make money that is attractive to women. Money is simply a benchmark of success.
The man who is successful, who makes money, must be confident, intelligent, skilled, and ambitious—for without these qualities it is highly unlikely he would have been successful in the first place.
It is your job to build value, and a woman’s job to recognize the value in you.
Women can sniff out and separate high value men from low value men with ease.
What Do Girls Want?
Girls want a lot, it’s true. They want fun, laughter, playfulness, intimacy, affection, love, mystery, challenge, intrigue, romance all packaged up in the right way.
If there’s one take away from this article, and perhaps the most important point it’s that women are attracted to masculine energy as opposed to feminine energy.
If you align yourself with the more masculine traits in your character such as confidence, boldness, strength, independence, freedom, and ambition then you will be seen as much more attractive and girls will desire you.
You must also remember that women respond to their emotions, not logic or reason. They are, like everyone else, irrational apes.
Until you have the ability to spike attraction and make an impact with women. You will largely go unnoticed. The easiest way to do this is to build value and exhibit social proof.
As a final, important point, you must never worry about what a girl wants; instead, you must give a girl what she needs not what she wants.
This is the key to attraction, the key that unlocks the door to intimacy, affection, and love.