If your girlfriend wants a break, what should you do? Convince her to stay in the relationship? Fight for her? Promise to change? Beg and plead? All of these mistakes.
7 Reasons Why your girlfriend wants a break
- She needs space
- She feels suffocated
- She’s angry or upset with you
- She’s irritated by you
- She’s feeling stressed out
- She’s lost attraction for you
- She’s testing you
The moment your girlfriend asks for a break, you must think to yourself: what is she really asking for? She’s asking for space.
However, most men don’t see it this way. The moment your girlfriend asks for a break, most men fall into a blind panic.
They assume that a break means “break up.” At this point, the man tries to convince his girlfriend why she doesn’t need a break. He knows better. He just needs to convince her how much he cares about her.
She doesn’t need a break, she just needs to see how much he loves her and cares about her.
With this in mind, the man attempts to beg, plead, cajole, persuade, and manipulate the woman into staying with him.
This is a classic mistake, but a mistake that is made all too frequently. Before you discover the best way to handle this tricky situation, it’s important to focus on why your girlfriend needs a break.
She Needs Space
Your girlfriend needs space. This is one of the most common reasons why a girl asks for a break. The need for space is a human need that must be respected.
The moment you fail to acknowledge this need for space, is the moment attraction starts to break down and deteriorate.
All too often we make the mistake of assuming that we can draw closer to a girl and make her more attracted to us by spending more time with her.
When, in fact, the opposite is true. Attraction grows in space, not close proximity. Bring space into the relationship, and you make a girl miss you, think about you, and desire you.
Failed to give space, and the girl grows tired of you. You become predictable, boring, stale, and tedious. You kill the important elements of attraction––mystery and challenge.
You become a known quantity, and therefore your value is diminished.
Human beings in relationships are in a constant battle between commitment and freedom. To have commitment you must also introduce freedom into your relationships for attraction to thrive and flourish.
If you fail to give a girl space, she will want to break at some point in time-that much is guaranteed.
She Feels Suffocated
If a girl feels suffocated, she will want space and ask for a break. But why would your girlfriend feel suffocated?
Again, this comes down to space. If you have spent too much time talking, texting, and hanging out with your girlfriend, she will need time away from you to recharge.
If you fail to introduce distance and space into your relationships, not only will you kill attraction, but you will find yourself in a situation where your girlfriend continually pulls away from you and requires space
you will be viewed as needy, clingy and irritating. All of these reasons are more than enough for a girl to ask for a break; and she’s right, she should have a break and time away from you.
A man should never be focused on women and relationships. A man should be focused on creation, purpose, drive, and building things. If you fail to do this, you will come across as feminine, for only feminine people are relationship focused.
Women are attracted to masculine energy, masculine energy is all about mission and purpose.
She’s Angry or Upset With You
If your girlfriend is angry with you, she will need some time away from you to recover.
It doesn’t matter why she’s angry, the result is the same. If you had an argument, upset her, cheated on her, then she will need time and space to regroup and recover her emotions.
You want to encourage her to take a break from you in this situation, because it gives her time to calm down, settle her emotions, and come back to you.
If you refuse to give her space in this situation, you will only add fuel to the fire and cause her more stress.
She’s Irritated by You
This is the gentler version of “she’s angry or upset” with you. If your girlfriend is irritated by you, this means your personality is turning her off.
Perhaps you’re always hanging around her, wanting to see her. She finds you too needy, too clingy, and too available.
In other words, you are the consummate nice guy. Sounds good on paper, but it’s not good for attraction. If you are too nice, and too relationship focused, you will start to irritate your girlfriend and turn her off.
Both irritation and anger lead to your girlfriend feeling stressed out by you. When your girlfriend feels stressed out, the end result is always the same: she will pull away from you and start to make herself more distant.
She’s Feeling Stressed Out
If your girlfriend is feeling stressed out by you, she will want a break. Stress comes from all areas of life.
When a woman is feeling stress in her life, whether that stress comes from her work, financial situation, or personal life, she will naturally withdraw and become difficult to deal with.
If you try to make yourself too available during this time and try to see her when she is feeling stress, then you will only be adding to her stress even more.
When you do this, she will pull away from you and become distant until her stress is gone.
The best way to relieve her stress from your point of view is to make yourself absent until she is ready to reach out to you.
Don’t feel like you have to fix her problems or her stress here, you don’t. She will come to you when she’s ready (and the stress has gone).
She’s Lost Attraction For You
It goes without saying, if a girl has lost attraction for you, her interest in seeing you will be reduced. Women lose attraction for various reasons.
The most common reasons why your girlfriend has lost attraction for you include: you are too responsive, you are too needy, you are too relationship focused, you’re too available, and you’re too nice (offering little in the way of challenge and mystery).
I’ve said it before, and it’s worth repeating again, attraction is more about avoiding mistakes than doing everything right.
Yes, there are many ways to appear attractive to women. But more important than this is avoiding things that kill attraction.
If you sense that your girlfriend has started to pull away from you and she’s asking for a break, it could mean that she’s lost attraction for you. This will be especially true if you notice that she no longer wants intimacy with you, and rarely reaches out to see you.
In this case, it’s important to start rebuilding attraction. How do you do this? We start by introducing space. You want your girlfriend to feel some tension and you need to spike her interest again.
She’s Testing You
Many women ask for a break as a form of test. It’s worth going over why this happens. Women test men to see if they are worthy of investment.
The weak, needy, insecure, feminine man is unworthy of investment from a woman.
On the other hand, the strong, confident, masculine man is a man women want to invest in. There is, however, no easy way for a woman to know a man’s true strength and confidence unless she tests him.
A simple, easy way for a woman to test a man is to pull away from him. She asks for a break and the week, insecure man starts to panic.
He begs and pleads for another chance. He shows that he is relationship focused, and, therefore, unworthy of the girls further invest
The confident man passes woman’s tests because he doesn’t panic. He simply shrugs his shoulders and tells the woman that she can do whatever she wants.
If she wants to leave, she can leave. Just as you would imagine someone like Sean Connery’s reponding to a woman telling him that she wants a break.
She Wants A Break, Now What?
If your girlfriend asks for break you must do what is counterintuitive. You must encourage her to take a break and have space.
Don’t attempt to fight it or try to convince her that she is wrong. This would be a big mistake.
In all my consultations with men, the biggest mistakes come from those men who refuse to believe that their girlfriends needs space. They refuse to allow it.
In turn, this raises a woman stress levels and makes her pull away from the man even more.
In 99% of cases, when a girl asks for a break, she isn’t asking to break up. She simply needs space. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that just because she says she wants a break, the relationship is over.
This isn’t true. A break simply means that you must give a woman space. If you refuse to give a woman space, you will turn a woman’s need for space into a real breakup.
In fact, this is why most breakups happen. The woman doesn’t want to break up with the man. She simply wants some time to herself. The man, however, through his behavior, turns the need for space into an actual breakup by his refusal to allow the temporary break to happen.
You mustn’t make the same mistake. If your girlfriend wants a break, embrace it and give it to her. Understand that attraction grows in space, and the more space you give her, the more she will miss you and feel attracted to you.