Getting a woman to chase you is a subtle process. There are, however, certain techniques you can use to get a woman to chase you. This article will show you how to get a woman focused on you so she wants to chase you.
Women are taught from an early age that it’s the man’s job to do the chasing. This is only half-true. When a man seduces a woman, he chases her, makes his move, and pushes through the woman’s initial resistance to become physically intimate with her.
It’s at this point that the woman transitions from being passive (allowing the man to chase her) to being proactive (where she actively chases the man).
A successful seduction requires you to let go and stop chasing. You must let a woman come to you and express her interest in you by allowing her to chase you. If you fail to allow this transition to take place, don’t be surprised if the woman loses attraction for you and pulls away.
Don’t Focus on the Relationship
The moment you focus on the relationship is the moment a woman starts to lose attraction. It’s tempting to tell a woman how you feel about her as though this will somehow soften her emotions and make her easier to seduce. When a man is focused on the relationship, he derails the seduction process.
The woman used to dream of the day when a man would come along and sweep her off her feet. But when that day finally arrives something inside the woman tells her that love shouldn’t be this way, and she’s right, it shouldn’t.
One of the problems we face as men is a natural discomfort at the speed with which women respond to messages, want to see us, and are willing to progress the relationship. All this can leave a man feeling uncomfortable and uncertain about where he stands and where the relationship is headed.
A woman knows when you’re chasing her out of desire as opposed to chasing her out of insecurity. This insecurity often leads men to take action in an attempt gain clarity and calm their nerves, but instead of feeling calm, the man inadvertently pushes the woman further away from him.
Given a choice between freedom and commitment, you must always choose freedom. An attractive man is a man with options. Why would you want to sacrifice your options for the sake of one woman? Instead, if a woman chases you, she can only draw one conclusion: you must be high-value otherwise she wouldn’t be chasing you.
Still, women continue to churn out the usual clichés: “If a man likes me, he should chase me” and “Women don’t chase, that’s a man’s job.” If you buy into this way of thinking, you become just another weak, beta male in hot pursuit. Your strength as a man lies in your ability to remain indifferent to a woman’s behavior, whether she’s chasing you or not.
Get A Woman to Chase You
Getting a woman to chase you is a subtle process. There are, however, certain techniques you can use to ensure a woman chases you and becomes more attracted to you. First, you must have the inner-strength to allow a woman to reach out to you. It’s always a good idea to adhere to the 80/20 rule. The 80/20 rule is a powerful concept that governs many areas of life, not just relationships.
For example, 80 percent of a company’s profit often comes from 20 percent of its customers; 80 percent of the world’s population lives in approximately 20 percent of the world’s land mass; 80 percent of the world’s wealth is owned by approximately 20 percent of the world’s population.
The 80/20 rule, when applied to male/female relationships, states that a man should reach out to a woman 20 percent of the time, and a woman should reach out to the man 80 percent of the time. Here, the 80/20 rule ensures the woman chases the man, and it also ensures there’s enough space and distance between the woman and the man for attraction to flourish.
Case Study: Never Chase Attraction
A week before Valentine’s Day, Sam booked a trip for himself and his girlfriend to Grenada in the Caribbean. Sam was doing well financially and he didn’t mind paying for the holiday. After all, he was a generous guy. When Sam got to Grenada with his girlfriend, Annie, the first thing they did was check into a beautiful five-star resort.
Sam hoped the resort would be the perfect environment to help resolve their two biggest relationship problems: no intimacy and no sex.
Sam had been dating Annie for about four months, and so far, Annie had refused to have sex with him. Annie said she didn’t want to rush things because she was afraid to get hurt. Sam reasoned that Annie just needed a little more time to warm up.
A week later, Sam and Annie returned home, and instead of feeling relaxed, Sam was furious. During their time away, Annie had refused to have sex with him or even give him so much as a kiss.
One night, at an all-time low, Sam had knelt beside the bed and begged Annie to have sex with him. From that point on their relationship had continued to deteriorate as Annie became increasingly rude and disrespectful.
Despite all this, the moment Sam got home, he sent Annie a message, hoping to reconcile their differences and fix the relationship: “Hey, hope you got home safe. Thanks for the trip. I miss you already X”
Sam waited for Annie to respond. An hour passed by, two hours passed by, three hours passed by… and still no response from Annie. This is bullshit; she’s so disrespectful, Sam thought.
At first, Sam just wanted to get everything back to normal. However, when he realized that Annie wasn’t going to play ball, he decided to change his approach and try to reason with her by sending her a heartfelt message:
“I know what we have is real. You have to understand that when we were on holiday together I didn’t give you the opportunity to see the real me. Maybe I was holding back too. But I want you to know that I’m here for you now. Ready to love you and be with you completely. All I ask is that you give us another chance and you’ll see how amazing our relationship can be.”
Annie responded a couple of hours later, and her response was anything but enthusiastic: “Thanks for the holiday and the kind words.”
After a couple of weeks trying to be nice, Sam lost his cool and sent Annie a message laced with venom: “Did I ever hurt you like your ex-boyfriends? Did I ever treat you with disrespect? Never. Did I go and have sex with other women then leave you like all your ex-boyfriends did? I was the one who was always there for you and showed you what true love really is. What did I get in return? Nothing. Nothing but complete disrespect and BS. You didn’t even want to kiss me on holiday. A holiday that I paid for. A holiday that cost me over $5,000! What I want to know is this, why did you have sex with your ex-boyfriends and not me?!?! They all treated you like shit and I treated you like a princess.”
Annie cringed when she read the message. Thank God, I didn’t have sex with him, that would have been a disaster. But hey, at least I got a free holiday out of it, Annie thought as she blocked Sam and deleted his number from her phone.
In the same way that you should never chase a woman over the phone, you must also refrain from chasing commitment. The moment you ask a woman that one fatal question: “Are we boyfriend and girlfriend?” is the moment she starts to question your masculinity. A woman will let you know when she wants to have a relationship with you, there’s no need to chase commitment.
Available Men are Less Attractive
A series of studies published in the European Journal of Personality observed that less available men are perceived to be more attractive and desirable. The researchers also discovered that people are willing to spend more money on less available people. In one of the studies, men were ranked as having either “low,” “intermediate” or “high” availability.
The female participants in the study were then asked whether or not they would be willing to spend their money to take one of the men out to a “fast food,” “casual,” or “fine dining” restaurant.
The results of the study showed that the female participants were much more likely to take a man to a “fine dining” restaurant if the man had “low availability.” This further explains why nice guys finish last.
If you’re too available, women can’t help but see you as low value and less attractive. If you get a woman to chase you, she’s going to value you; and if she values you, she can’t help but find you attractive.